Grandparents Give the Worst Christmas Gifts, Right Chewbacca?!
As a kid, one of the most amazing times of the year was Christmas. It just always seemed like a moment and spirit trapped in time -- whether that be because my Grandma Mohney was a kid at heart who turned her entire house into a winter wonderland or because family and friends seemed to be so much closer and strangers seemed to be so much nicer.
I loved the lights. I loved the music. I loved the joy. I loved the presents. Well, for the most part. There never were any presents more disappointing than the ones from my grandparents. I don't know if they were so disappointing because I always thought my grandparents were the closest things to Santa or because I thought they somehow were cooler than my parents because they always spoiled me throughout the year or simply because it was totally humiliating to unwrap a package of underwear. I just remember thinking "wow, you don't get me at all."
Then today, at age 48, I was in line at Walgreens. I, of course, was in a hurry and almost lost it when I saw the old woman in front of me dump out her change purse onto the counter. "25 cents, 30, 55, $1..." I almost offered to pay for everything in her cart because I could barely stand it!!
Then I heard her say, "I have been looking for a present for my great-grandson. He loves Star Wars, don't you know. But he is very particular about who he likes. He really likes the big furry one. Oh, gosh, I can't remember...he's really tall and growls and shoots people...oh, he's really hairy but I can't remember his name, it's something like..."
"OMG!!!! CHEWBACCA. PLEASE, DEAR GOD, CHEWBACCA!" I think I thought to myself...
"$3.83, 3.93, 4.93..." now the clerk was counting the coins, as well as my last remaining nerves. I was like, "Lady, SERIOUSLY?!"
"I've seen a lot of things with, oh, my, what's the big animal's name..."
"CHEW. BAH. CAH. OH. EM. GEE."
"$11.87, 12.87..."
"Oh, my land, here's a $5 bill!"
I think I screamed "17 F****** DOLLARS AND 87 CENTS!!!" but pretty sure it was in my head...pretty...sure...
"But I think THIS is the one he'll REALLY love."
She stopped counting her change and looked up at the clerk. Then she looked over at me.
Seconds before, all I wanted was for her to get the heck out of my way so I could pay for my razor, diet Coke, deodorant and People Magazine.
But when she looked at me, all I could think about was how many stores she must have gone to...how many "furry Star Wars animal things" she must have looked at and how she had saved enough money to get the perfect gift.
I thought about my own grandparents and the packages of underwear, the Donny & Marie turn table, the PJs and how hard it must have been to know what to get me and my sister. I thought about how happy they must have been when they believed they finally got it right.
"He's going to absolutely love it," I said.
She grabbed her bags and walked away. I started to cry like a crazy person in line at Walgreens and just looked up to the sky and said, "Grandma and Grandpa, I loved it all."
Story Credit by music and entertainment insider Ron Roecker.