5 Things You Should Stop Feeling Guilty About
A common thread in humanity is self-sabotage. In our never-ending quest for happiness and achievement, a small, piercing voice asks, "Why me?" We wonder why we deserve to be happy when other people are literally and emotionally starved. This is a good question to ask, but the answer is not guilt. Life is too short to not enjoy it, which is why you shouldn't let the following things get to you.
1. Having a good childhood.
Anti-bullying organizations exist is to give more children better childhoods. If you had one, great. That's what is supposed to happen. It is no one's right to assume you are less of a person because you didn't struggle to fit in, or feel loved. Struggle often molds a character that is unspoiled and empathetic, but that doesn't mean your lack of struggle has spoiled you. You have the choice and responsibility to understand the lives of those worse off than you, but you don't owe it to anyone to be unhappy. The best way to regard your happy childhood is with gratitude and respect for those who made it happen (that includes you).
2. Having a life partner you're actually in love with.
If your friends and family envy your partnership with another man or woman, that's on them, not you. If you're really in love with someone, you're not rubbing it in anyone's face, or talking about him in obscene volumes. If you're in love, you're in love, and your real friends would rejoice with you. Don't expect a damn dinner party; expect them to be happy for you rather than pray an angry wasp gets trapped in your car.
3. Being good looking.
Here's the deal with being attractive: you didn't do it; biology did. You deserve neither to be proud nor guilty as it is neither accomplishment nor crime. That gorgeous hairline, and those angelic earlobes were given to you at random by mother nature. Anyone who tries to make you feel guilty for "not knowing what it's like to be ugly," has some serious inner demon that she needs to wrestle or snuggle with depending on its demeanor. Oh, and for the record, anyone who says "It's a good thing you're pretty," is not complimenting you. Stop inviting that person to brunch immediately.
4. Having wealthy parents.
Being well off doesn't mean you're a monster. Money has the power to turn us into Scrooges, but even that guy came around. So, your parents gave you five months rent in a furnished NYC apartment. So what! And meanwhile, your friends are trying to live in the same shoe-sized loft that's sandwiched between a "Pet Shop" that certainly isn't part of a drug cartel, and some guy who thinks the walls are alive. There will definitely be resentment coming your way, and honestly, can you blame them? The good news is that unless you take it for granted, you shouldn't feel bad that your parents are helping you. They're supposed to. Be thankful and enjoy the gift.
5. Being naturally good at something.
Talent and intelligence are like good looks. They come (or don't come) naturally to us, and not of our own doing. In our culture, we like to give credit where credit is due, and often, we give credit to those who work hard to achieve greatness. When greatness is put easily within our reach, however, we feel guilty about the lack of work it took to get there. Stop this. As Morgan Freeman said, "Doing it is not the hard part. The hard part is getting to do it." Be thankful for your talents, celebrate them, and put them to good use. You've got the tools to be great, now all you need is the chance. Rather than guilt yourself into thinking you don't deserve it, spend your time trying to find it. The payoff will be far better.