The 10 Best Things To Do On Presidents Day
Presidents' Day may be confusing, but don't think for a second that it doesn't have an epic amount of potential to be the best three-day weekend of your LIFE. Here are some activities to get you going:
1. Dress up as your favorite sassy president-alter-ego:
George Sassington
Hipsterbram Lincoln
2. Dress your CAT up as your favorite sassy president-alter-ego and see how quickly you can do it.
Wear thick clothing, a mask and gloves, because he'll probably be like:
But it'll be worth it because once you dress him up, he'll be all:
3. Celebrate the vision of our fore-fathers by making a melting pot-inspired meal: Celebrate America's diversity with a meal that incorporates cuisines from multiple cultures.
4. Find out how many years four score and seven is, and then tell the rest of us.
5. Throw a mini-revolution
Go to a coffee shop dressed as George Washington. When the barrista rings you up, ask why it costs more than the price on the menu. When he/she explains to you that it's the total after taxes, throw red, white and blue confetti in the air, scream, "VIVE LA LIBERTÉ!" and run out without paying.
6. Make an unofficial constitution for your house.
I recommend adding these:
- In order to give equal opportunity to all appendages, lights shall be turned on and off by a different body part each time.
- If a member of the household enters the kitchen to cook something, said household member may only moon-walk into the kitchen, while reciting a riddle that hints at what will be made.
example: If one were to make popcorn, moon-walk into the kitchen saying It's about to get poppin'.
- All household members shall powder their hair. Not only does it pay homage to the follicle fads of our founding fathers, it also eliminates grease like a charm.
- At mealtime, all individuals at table are required to wear an ascot.
7. Photoshop a mustache on a President's face:
8. Pretend you have secret service when you do errands.
You will have to:
- Finding a friend with a black car, and tape little flags on the front.
- Have friend dress in a black suit and aviators, and drive you around town.
- Find two other friends to dress the same and ride around with you.
- When outside of the car, they must surround you at all times and never take their glasses off.
I haven't tested it, but I'm pretty sure you could get into anywhere.
9. Write a Ronald Reagan fan-fiction
Here's the premise: A young Ronald gets a job at a jelly-bean factory to pay for acting school. His boss is an Ape named Thiefy McStickyfingers, and together they have to find out who's been stealing all the black jelly-beans!
Sound good? Good, now go forth and CREATE.
10. It's freezing out. Get out there and chop some firewood like the president/boss/vampire hunter you always wanted to be.
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