Gifts Your Dad Will Actually Love For Father's Day

1. The card. Start out small with a touch of funny. If Father's Day were a sitcom, I have the sneaking suspicion it would be akin to the Three Stooges. Here are a few Dad-Day cards for inspiration. Click the captions to purchase.

Etsy

Etsy

2. The swag. Dad's secretly love clothes and accessories, but they don't like it when you call them clothes and accessories. Instead, call them swag, and he'll don them with alacrity.

 Gustin Crowd-Sourced Denim: $81 (wholesale!) Get a pair.

Werd

 Bauhaus Key Carabiner: $28-$66. When you become a dad, you get a hook-things-to-your-pants pass. There's simply no amount of energy that can be wasted on squeezing things in and out of pockets any more. Best to hook the keys somewhere more easily accessible. Belt loop this puppy.

Werd

Bass Guitar String Bracelets: $16.00. Let's face it, your dad probably played bass when he was in college. If not, then he's at least thought of it. Work it.

Cool Material

Watch Movement Cufflinks: $55.00. I would actually wear cufflinks if I had these. Go get 'em!

Cool Material

3. Patio Prowess. Even if your pop's an indoor chef, everyone likes to enjoy some time outside with the fam. Here are some affordable gadgets to help make the ideal patio paradise

Portable insect repeller: $15. Ew, bugs, GET AWAY. No one, except a crazy person wants bugs crashing his patio-sesh  Get it.

Werd

BBQ Bruce Handrail Grill: $80. Want a quick kabob? No problemo. Order the least intrusive grill ever made here.

Connox

Sur La Table Stuff A Burger Press: $11.95. Burger variations just went from infinity to beyond. Purchase this heaven descended miracle RIGHT NOW.

Sur La Table

4. The Tools. Normally, this is a little cliché, but when tools are married to exceptional convenience, anyone would be happy to have these two items:

The Cole Bar: $65. This sleek designed tool is actually seven in one. Goodbyyye toolbox.  Own it.

Werd

Key Tools: $6.95. I've surprised myself with how many times this week I've randomly needed a small screw-driver. These take up little space and could come in handy. Go get 'em.

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5. The books. Give him something good to get lost in, whether it's a fantastic recipe or mind-consuming story line. A good book is a gift not easily forgotten. Here are a couple titles to inspire you.

The Hot Sauce Cook Book: $12.45. Don't let the price fool you. Get this awesome book now.

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Sh*t My Dad Says:  $15.99 at most independent bookstores (this one will ship it to you).

This might be one of the funniest books ever written--certainly the funniest about father-son relationships. Chelsea Handler wasn't kidding when she said it was "ridiculously hilarious." You might want to read it before you give it to your old man.

Daddy Scrubs

6. Breakfast. The most important meal to get your father to love you more than your siblings of the day.

Baked Eggs & Chorizo. Mmmmmm, chorizoooo. Get the recipe.

Werd

7. Lunch. Only a fool says no to lunch. A bigger fool says no to a free one.

Open Faced Italian Meatball Sandwich with Pesto and Provolone. Food is the way to a man's heart, and I think this might suddenly compel him to give you money. Get the recipe here.

The Well Floured Kitchen

8. Dinner, that thing we can't stop thinking about after lunch.

Grilled Kielbasa and Pesto Penne. If your dad's a real kielbasa lover, he could probably eat it like a banana. If that's the case, he'll be floored by this simple, well made meal. Get the recipe.

Werd

9. Beverage assistance. The most important thing is what's in the cup, I'll agree with you on that. This means that when we see fancy beverage toys, we shame ourselves for even the thought of spending our hard-earned cash on something so frivolous as a bottle opener shaped like a mermaid. This is where you come in, spawn and protégé of your dear father. Spice up his wine bar with a few knick-knacks that will make his friends green with envy.

Mermaid Bottle Opener: $10.00. Yarg, catch this water witch 'afore yer too late.

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Bicycle Wine Rack: $39.95. I'd buy a bicycle just to use this. Get it.

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Whiskey Stones + Glasses: $31.99. These puppies are worth the dough. Keep them in the freezer (in an included little tray) and they'll keep your dad's nightly cocktail at an ideal 59˚F. Get 'em, get 'em, get 'em!

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